For my writing job, I had to interview a woman who is a clothing designer. One of the questions I had asked was, what was her favorite part of designing? Was it conceptualizing a design the construction and so on. She had said, that she was a project starter but had a hard time doing the rest: meaning her favorite part is conceptualizing. I didn’t interrupt, but I wanted to say, “oh man me too!” The big difference between myself and the woman, who I had interviewed, is that I don’t just have a hard time with the follow through, I just don’t follow through. I have nothing to hold me accountable for my dreams so it is easy to let them slide and wallow in time passed and things left undone.
So, I’m back to conceptualizing and so far I have managed to do two days toward my many, oh so many, goals for my life. It all centers around the goal of being a full-time fiction writer and a part-time… uh… I’ll get back to you on that, but there are some ideas. Right now my driving force is money. Money rules the gaddamn world. It’s enough ta make ya puke. I make pretty low on the pay scale, but on the flexibility and great co-workers scale, you can rarely get higher. It is tough looking for work and I’m not interested in going back into an office so that means more hours at the retail job. I’ve upped my time to six days a week leaving Sunday as my only day of rest. Only, it is not my day of rest, it is my day of writing.
My daily goal is to rise at 8:30 ( I know it is not early, but if you knew me, really knew me, you would know 8:30 is my hell) get dressed and start writing for an hour than head to work. After work I return home and write for an hour. Then reading, I have to read everyday. That gives me two hours of writing a day, not much but not bad. So that leaves Sunday for the bulk of my writing, and everything else that I had not been able to take care of during the week. This of course is basic house stuff, laundry, going for my once a week run (I have to do something) and doing more writing. There are other things. I have the workshops coming up so I need to start prepping for those, and I have thought about grad school for some time now and it is about time I start looking into some places with serious conviction. And, I need to get another writing gig, something small and easy that can help with just a little more dough. I know this is boring to read about, but this happens to be where I am right now. My small social life is pretty much vanquished at this moment, but I’m okay with that, I have been social enough. It is time for conception to turn to construction.